No, I never read the word "technoference" before today, either. But according to some sociologists, technoference is what happens when a parent pays more attention to a mobile phone than to their children. And the results are not good.
An article by Clare Morell on the news website The Dispatch points out that even if children don't have mobile phones or screens themselves, their lives are significantly affected when their parents do. A study that compared rates of parental mobile phone use with how well their children do when starting school found that kids whose parents used their phones a lot had deficits in language and interpersonal skills.
Another problem comes when children try to learn new life skills. It turns out that parental "scaffolding"—basic support and encouragement—is vital for children to control their emotions when dealing with new situations. If Mommy is off in cyberspace when Junior is trying to color within the lines for the first time, she can't provide the reassurance and guidance which, however trivial-seeming for the parent, can make an earthshattering difference for the child.
I'm pretty sure I remember the first time I rode a bike without training wheels. And it was when my father held the bike for me to get on, and then gave it enough of a shove that it would stay upright no matter what I did. Suddenly I could make it go on my own. This was about three decades before the advent of mobile phones, and while my upbringing was not without problems, mobile-phone technoference wasn't one of them.
Full disclosure: I have never been a parent, so I can't speak about childraising from personal experience. But there is one childraising principle I have observed in action over many years, which the article terms "over-imitating." I prefer to state it as follows: "Whatever Daddy (or Mommy) does is OK." This is a deep and profound, even subconscious, tendency in children to accept, embrace, and imitate whatever they see their parents doing. It plays out in everything from such minor habits as habitual finger-tapping to major malfeasances such as adultery. And I'm sure it applies to mobile-phone use as well.
One interesting study found that even babies are affected by a parent using a mobile phone within the child's field of view, even if the baby doesn't need anything in particular at the time. If you observe the expressions of people while they are looking at their phones, it's a kind of passive, zoned-out look that showed up a lot when a sociologist decided to install a camera on a TV and take pictures of people as they watched television. The researchers call this a "still face." It turns out that showing a still face to an infant isn't good, because it gives the infant no positive feedback or assurance that the mother or father is paying attention to the child. This passive look often inspires the infant to cry or otherwise try to attract attention. If Mommy stays glued to her phone, Junior escalates provocations until he gets some kind of reaction, which by this time will probably be a negative one.
Yet another study showed a correlation between a four-times-greater incidence of depression in teenagers and high rates of mobile phone use among parents.
Now, as we should constantly remind ourselves when reading about research like this, correlation isn't necessarily causation. The crisis in reproducibility of scientific studies means that statistical methods are often misapplied in an illogical way. That is a topic for another blog. But even if we disregard all the statistics and simply ask, "Can a parent's mobile-phone use get in the way of their attempts to be a good parent?" I think the answer is obvious. Of course it can, but what can we do about it?
Morell has a number of recommendations, some of which are easier to do than others. She suggests having a "phone box" to put phones in at the end of the day, so parents and children are both freed up to interact without distractions. How one would define the day's end is up to the individual, but it sounds like a good idea. I have a phone you can actually turn off, and I set it in my study and leave it there overnight.
She suggests putting away your phone whenever you are with your children. For some people, especially single moms, that is a big ask. But at least consciously setting aside a no-phone interval each day might be a good idea. The only time these days I am around parents with a lot of children is when I go to church, and except for the stray ringtone during the sermon, you might otherwise think that my church is a phone-free zone. That's an unusual situation, though, and I have no idea what these parents do with regard to mobile phones when they are home with their kids. A good many of them homeschool, however, and you can bet the phone is put away during those times.
Morell says she uses something called a Wisephone. A visit to that firm's website shows that their product has "no social media, no explicit content, no web browser" but can do basic stuff like maps, calling for rides, playing music, dealing with money, and checking the weather. That's two or three more things than I use my phone for, so I'm ahead of her already in that regard.
I'm also in sync with her recommendations to go analog (or at least not use your phone for everything): get a separate alarm clock (check), use a paper calendar (check), use a real camera instead of your phone camera (check), and use a notepad and pen (check). I claim no particular virtue for doing these things: I just never quit doing them when I got a mobile phone. Others may have more of a problem transitioning.
So even if kids don't have mobile phones themselves, their parents' phones can cause problems. Parenting is a huge responsibility, and my metaphorical hat is off to anyone who attempts it. Just be aware that your smartphone may get in the way of being the best parent you want to be.
Sources: Clare Morell's article "Parents, Put Down the Phones" is on the (paywall-protected, unfortunately) website The Dispatch, which some may be able to access at https://thedispatch.com/article/parenting-phones-screen-time-kids-development-imitation/. I also referred to the Wisephone website at https://wisephone.com/.